Patti's random noise

QotD: Very Superstitious

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 18:08:32 -0700

Do you have any crazy superstitions?

It's bad luck to be superstitious.

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QotD: QotD

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Thu, 10 Jul 2008 00:33:14 -0700

What criteria do you feel makes a good QotD?
Submitted by stueykins.

I find that grammatical correctness is an excellent start. I'm a huge fan of subject-verb agreement.

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QotD: I Don't Mean To Brag, But...

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Fri, 11 Jan 2008 23:10:06 -0800

Do you have an unusual talent that you are ridiculously proud of? If so, what is it, and why the smug look on your face?
Submitted by mo.

Why yes, yes I do. And that's why I'm smiling.

"Look ma, no hands!" she says somewhat cryptically.

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QotD: My Best Gift

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Tue, 04 Dec 2007 09:46:03 -0800

What is the best present you have ever given?
Submitted by quornflour.

I hate questions that want me to pick out the very best X, or my favorite X, or my least favorite X... how does one quantify these things? Instead, here's a gift that surprised and delighted the recipient.

My friend, let's call him Mr. M, is an interesting character. He ran the MIT blackjack team for years. He's been a professional gambler for much of his life. He's a computer geek, used to run a bed and breakfast, and just generally fits into the quirky genius category. As is to be expected with people like him, he has an interesting history with lots of stories to tell, and stories to be told about him.

One day I was going batshit crazy trying to figure out what to buy him for his birthday, and coming up empty. Then a cosmic ray of inspiration struck my brain, and I decided to make something rather than buying it. The result was this poster.

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QotD: Everybody Change!

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Sat, 17 Nov 2007 09:51:26 -0800

Stop top-posting.

And stop quoting the whole message.

If you could get everyone in the world to change their behavior in one way, what would you have them do differently?
Submitted by Ross.

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QotD: Never Going Back Again

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Thu, 08 Nov 2007 23:45:20 -0800

What's been your worst experience at a restaurant?

Lucky Chances-- a poker room in Colma. The food there is generally pretty mediocre, though ordering breakfast food or Filipino food is usually a safe bet. I used to play a ton of poker there, so I routinely had meals at the poker table. When I was playing professionally, just asking for the usual was generally sufficient.

One night, I made the terrible mistake of ordering sweet & sour pork. I don't know what came over me, as this isn't a dish I would normally eat, but for some reason it sounded good. After all, hundreds of Asians ate there every day... how bad could it be?

I missed the next two days of work, because all of my time was being spent curled up in bed wishing I would die, or running to the bathroom. When I recovered my sense of humor, the phrase bidirectionally explosive was the best description I could come up with, though it was wholly inadequate. As much as I wanted one, there's no safeword on food poisoning.

After that, my office mate could make me cringe and start feeling sick just by saying the words sweet and sour pork. He found this much funnier than I did.

Maybe two years later, I was having dinner there with a friend after a poker tournament. Having learned my lesson well, I ordered the Filipino breakfast-- scrambled eggs, longanissa, and garlic fried rice. If the Filipino food is safe and breakfast food is safe, Filipino breakfast should be the belt & suspenders solution, right? It's actually a rather tasty combination, although it's not really high on anyone's list of health foods.

Three hours later, I felt like someone was jabbing a knife between my ribs. Repeatedly. And a dull, rusty knife at that. I called a cab and had them deliver me to the nearest emergency room, cringing and moaning every time we went over a bump. I was in so much pain that IV Toradol did nothing... I wasn't able to breathe comfortably until they shot me up with morphine. And that was the beginning of the end for my gall bladder.

It's really only coincidence that the two events happened after eating at the same place, but I still try to avoid eating there.

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QotD: World Series 2007

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Mon, 22 Oct 2007 13:46:28 -0700

What are your predictions for the World Series?

Some team will win. The other team will lose. It will all quickly fade into history and not be the least bit relevant to anyone except a few die-hard fans who have nothing better to do than obsess over minutiae.

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QotD: MLB Playoff Predictions

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Mon, 01 Oct 2007 17:45:19 -0700

What are your Major League Baseball playoff predictions?

Some team will win. A bunch of teams will lose. It will all quickly fade into history and not be the least bit relevant to anyone except a few die-hard fans who have nothing better to do than obsess over minutiae.

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QotD: Back In The News - O.J. Simpson

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Tue, 18 Sep 2007 21:16:07 -0700

O.J. Simpson is back in the news again. What are your thoughts on the release of "If I Did It" and his recent arrest?

Yawn

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QotD: This Is What I Do To Plants

nobody@vox.com(Patti) — Sun, 09 Sep 2007 21:29:52 -0700

Do you have a green thumb?

Don't be silly. I do not have a green thumb, a purple toe, an orange earlobe, or a chartreuse microbus.

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